What You Missed

The Card report would like to offer its sincerest apologies for its absence over the last few days. Our computer was fried in Iowa, and the only other one we have access to here was pieced together by Satan himself.

And yet we persevere.

We begin with the continuously unfolding and always entertaining Willie Williams saga.

On July 11 Williams, the#1 rated linebacker in the country coming out of high school, was granted a release from Miami where he played sparingly as a freshman and would have been forced to sit out the 2006 season because of a knee injury.

Seemingly a sexy recruit (out of high school the 6-foot-3, 230-pound kid was timed in the 4.4-second range in the 40-yard dash and recorded a 35-inch vertical jump and 330-pound bench press), many schools balked at the idea of taking Williams whose 11 arrests for burglary and other offenses during his high school tenure had made his signing with Miami highly controversial. Three high profile teams, however, ultimately appeared on Williams' sort list: West Virginia, Tennessee and Louisville.

Here's where things get interesting.

On July 14, Yahoo! Sports' (Seriously can we lose the exclamation point? I feel fucking ridiculous whenever I have to type that) John Murphy reported that Williams had made a decision and was transferring to WVU.

Apparently Yahoo! forgot to tell Murphy a few things before they shipped him out into the wild world of sports journalism:

1. Your hair makes you look like a douche.
2. Don't select a photo that was taken while you were drunk and unaware that you were being photographed as the picture that will appear below your name in each piece of writing that you submit.

And of course:
3. You can't make up stories.

When Mountaineer head coach Rich Rodriguez was shown the report he first remarked, "Who the fuck is John Murphy?" and next "Yeah, Willie's not coming here." After WVU spurned Williams' advances, Tennessee followed suit a day later.

That leaves Louisville who was unwilling to immediately reject the possiblity that they would at least entertain the prospects of taking on this talented ex-con. Except no one from the Wiliams camp has spoken with anyone at U of L as of today.

It looks as though Petrino and company are going to seriously consider taking this kid, but they shouldn't, and it has nothing to do with him personally.

Petrino has done wonders to shed the "Thug U" image that he inherited from John L. Smith, and it would be a shame for that image to take a hit here. Though it's not entirely true, whoever ends up taking Williams will be viewed by the public as a program willing to take a kid that was viewed as a kid too troubled to make it at Miami, Tennessee or West Virginia. While Miami and Tennessee have each had their share of very public "if you ain't cheatin you ain't tryin" moments, the school in the trio that U of L should be most worried about is West Virginia.

The Cards and Mountaineers are in the blooming stages of what looks to be the most heated football, and possbily all sports, rivalry in the new Big East. For Louisville to take a kid who chose WVU first, but was passed over by the Mounties because of character concerns would be a massive error in judgement. West Virginia and the rest of the conference would view Louisville's accepting of Williams as a clear indication that the Cards are a "win at all costs" program that is more than willing to sacrifice character for glory. Whether or not its true is completely irrelevant, like anything else in college football perception is greater than reality.

The Card Report wishes nothing but success for Willie Williams, we just hope, and it's nothing personal, that it doesn't come in a Louisville uniform.


The other big story of this week is that UK fans are still really creepy, ignorant and sad.

Example one, this guy:

Ok, now I want you to imagine this guy writing a song about UK basketball.

Ok now (here's the amazing part) click this link, hit the play button and listen as the exact same song that you just thought about blares from your speakers.

Best part (as far as we can understand):
"Well 10 years 'been a long time for ya, Tubby Now you'd better get it done this year, buddy Oh You'd better win... you'd better win 'Cause my woman's gettin' tarred and my dog's gettin' hungry And my gun's all gone and I'm gettin' lonely... YEAH. YEAH!"

Also a huge fan of rhyming "friend" with (what else) "friend."

How can you not adore a man who sings about killing his friend, wife, dog and I'm sure various other breathing things that we just can't decipher from his lyrics, but graces his band page with a picture of himself leaning against a car and flashing a peace sign.

Rural Kentucky, it's faanntastic.

More:

Officially the lowpoint for Kentucky fandom (KSR Blog)
Oh Napier interview
Oh Napier Band Page


Example Two: Melissa and Glenn are two lifelong UK fans who are married and about to have a baby. They've been racking their brains for ways to ensure that their child hates them and ends up as screwed up as possible, when they finally decide to deck baby Ayden's room out with Kentucky Wildcat merchandise everywhere.

After all who wouldn't want their precious little baby sleeping next to a giant Wildcat that appears ready to maul them at any given second?

Anyhow, Melissa and Glenn are so proud of their new room that they decide to post pictures on a blog to show off. Let's just say the response wasn't what they were expecting.


And finally Example Three: UK was forced to report a minor violation to the NCAA on Wednesday after its creepy fans had flooded the MySpace page of recruit Patrick Patterson. According to the NCAA, only coaches are allowed to contact potential recruits.

More catching up later, keep playing NCAA 2007 until then.